Football's opening weekend is in full force people. Three words....... Who Ya Got?
Welcome back Football, and welcome back gamblers. I know you've all been trying your best to stay motived by betting on boring a$$ baseball, but its time to get back to losing your mortgage and kids college funds on the best sport in America.
Many of you wonderful, fine, upstanding citizens are scouring the internet in search of that "John Anthony" character in the movie 'Two for the Money' to help make you rich and quit that job of yours that you hate so much. So how is it going so far? Have you already lost a ton betting on college? It's okay, I'm sure you will be doubling up on the pros the next day and make it all back. God Bless America. Land of the free, home of the brave, and filled with many who will be on their knees as the place kicker on a team down 24 points with a minute to go in the game attempts to make a field goal which would kill your bet of the other team winning by at least 22. (Honey! its okay!, I'm just crying because my stomach hurts! Must have been the extra spicy chicken wings!.......No I'm not betting on sports again!)
You know, I've always been curious about this. Why is it illegal in most states to bet on sports, but its completely legal in all states to gamble on the stock market? Oh yeah, that's right, its because the market is based on companies.......owned by the rich.....who donate millions to politicians....and who will gladly allow all of us loyal employees to keep our jobs as long as we all chip in and put money into their company in the form of stock options......That is until that rich CEO and fellow board members spend too much of that hard earned money in advance on yachts, cars, "business trips" overseas, etc., and later has to file for bankruptcy, which causes you to lose everything you put in the market, and causes all the employees to lose their jobs and pension plans......Jesus, sounds like the worst, most horrible, despicable human beings I have ever met.....And to make it worse, they were wearing Armani suits at the time they robbed you of everything you had.............Shoot, at least the sports bookies are all openly shady and dress like overpriced valet's and/or members of the SOPRANOS, so it would pretty much be expected if they robbed you blind.
Oh well, good luck everybody.................Go Giants!
Many of you wonderful, fine, upstanding citizens are scouring the internet in search of that "John Anthony" character in the movie 'Two for the Money' to help make you rich and quit that job of yours that you hate so much. So how is it going so far? Have you already lost a ton betting on college? It's okay, I'm sure you will be doubling up on the pros the next day and make it all back. God Bless America. Land of the free, home of the brave, and filled with many who will be on their knees as the place kicker on a team down 24 points with a minute to go in the game attempts to make a field goal which would kill your bet of the other team winning by at least 22. (Honey! its okay!, I'm just crying because my stomach hurts! Must have been the extra spicy chicken wings!.......No I'm not betting on sports again!)
You know, I've always been curious about this. Why is it illegal in most states to bet on sports, but its completely legal in all states to gamble on the stock market? Oh yeah, that's right, its because the market is based on companies.......owned by the rich.....who donate millions to politicians....and who will gladly allow all of us loyal employees to keep our jobs as long as we all chip in and put money into their company in the form of stock options......That is until that rich CEO and fellow board members spend too much of that hard earned money in advance on yachts, cars, "business trips" overseas, etc., and later has to file for bankruptcy, which causes you to lose everything you put in the market, and causes all the employees to lose their jobs and pension plans......Jesus, sounds like the worst, most horrible, despicable human beings I have ever met.....And to make it worse, they were wearing Armani suits at the time they robbed you of everything you had.............Shoot, at least the sports bookies are all openly shady and dress like overpriced valet's and/or members of the SOPRANOS, so it would pretty much be expected if they robbed you blind.
Oh well, good luck everybody.................Go Giants!
Nice article. I'll take a 3 team parlay over stock options any day. A car bomb in Uganda doesn't effect my over/under.
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